My Life, My Life, My Life

So I feel a little older, feel a bit like my birthday came a little early this year.

Maybe this whole unemployment thing is forcing me to grow up faster than I normally would. I think this is both a good thing and a bad thing. Good that's it happening, but bad that unemployment was the catalyst.

I hoping to find a new job here very soon. I've learned to let go of my pride and get a job that will pay the bills and keep food in the fridge and worry about finding a job I both want and like later when I have that option.

I have to admit that it infuriates me that I keep getting passed over for positions that I feel I am PERFECTLY qualified for, but then again I guess everyone out there in unemployment land feels the same way. You want companies to give you a straight up answer then they slam the door in your face rather than selling you the company line. Sure they don't want to hurt your feelings or whatever, but I'd rather know the real reason they didn't hire me and that way I can try to rectify it before approaching another possible employer.

I need to get back writing. I haven't really had the will to do so because my mind has been so preoccupied with finding work. I suppose I could be using this time to find an agent since I'm finished with my first novel and really think that it has a damn good chance of being published. I don't know, maybe I'm scared, maybe I don't have my priorities in order, or maybe I'm just lazy. I know where to start and yet I don't. I know it costs nothing and at the same time it costs everything.

I feel like I'm standing where I've always stood, in confusion wondering where the hell my life is going. And yet I also feel as if a great change is coming. It has to be, I just hope it's a good one.